• For the fourth time, Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio is considering running for governor of Arizona. He said he might run this time because it is “different.”
• Here is an idea that is hopefully junked by the military. It has been proposed to parachute bears into Afghanistan to hunt down Osama bin Laden. Bears have a keener sense of smell than dogs…bigger brain than whomever proposed this idea too.
• Senator John McCain’s Republican challenger J.D. Hayworth is behind in the polls, and there is a reason for that. Hayworth suggested that gay marriage might lead to people marrying horses.  
• The Georgia Supreme Court ruled that one does not need to be a sex offender to be placed in the sex offender registry.
• Did the Army view Wikileaks as a threat?
• The Iranian leadership is so afraid of its people, that it is now banning a bonfire festival because of fears that the opposition might use it for a rally.
• The Romanian “drunk pedestrian” sign has been removed because of massive media attention.
• Israel’s ambassador to the U.S. said that the two nation’s ties are the worst in 35 years.

Human Rights Watch criticized a British-made wand as “worse than a roll of the dice” at detecting drugs and weapons. The wand, known as the GT 200, even caught the attention of the British government.

The British are considering legislation banning its sale. As a precaution they have notified foreign governments of the wand’s poor performance.

Mexico spent $10 million on 521 of the wands, but continues to ignore the British warning. Mexican officals are convinced that the GT 200 works and tout its ability to locate all sorts of contraband.

“We’ve had success with it. It works with molecules. It functions with the energy of the body.” Capt. Jesús Héctor Larios Salazar of the Mexican Army’s antidrug unit in Culiacán said.

Say what? Molecules? Energy of the body?

Supposedly this device can determine a handgun and cocaine or plastic explosives and marijuana. There must a contraband molecule yet to be discovered that this wand senses if its advocates are to be believed.

Double blind studies have not been able to validate the many claims of the GT 200.

It is not just the Mexican government that is crazy about this wand. Thailand, China and Iraq have spent millions on similar devices to the GT 200 known as Sniffex, ADE 651, and Alpha 6 bomb/drugs/ insurgent detectors.

Iraq purchased 1,500 of the ADE 651 devices at the price of $16,000 to $60,000.

Who knows what the $60,000 model does. Perhaps it passes as a divining rod for water when not pointing for weapon caches.

The U.S. military will have nothing to do with it. On retired American officer explained that it works “on the same principle as a Ouija board.”

“Whether it’s magic or scientific, what I care about is it detects bombs,” said Maj. Gen. Jehad al-Jabiri, head of the Iraqi Ministry of the Interior’s General Directorate for Combating Explosives.

Great. We fight a war in Iraq and leave it to the fate of those who believe in magic.

Yet, al-Jabiri might be right about the “magic” part though. The user of a GT 200 must place a plastic card with bar codes into a holder that connects to the wand by a cable. Then, it gets interesting. The user is supposed to have a steady pulse and body temperature to make device work properly. The user must then walk properly to “charge” the wand. Without batteries, it needs to be charged by the movements of the user. It must be carried at the proper angle so that an antenna will swivel towards the contraband.

If the wand does not work, it is the fault of the user or, and get this, the presence of perfume, gold fillings or air fresheners.

In Mexico, last November, a GT 200 pointed at a Volkswagen with a man, woman and child inside. A search of the car turned up nothing, except for a bottle of Tylenol. That was used as proof of how sensitive the GT 200 is by its supporters.

The use of these devices would make a fine joke, except that lives are being lost by the bombs and guns missed with a wand that seems to draw its power through suggestion.

Or as one blogger put it, “The only things these machines can detect are idiots.”

There’s trouble brewing in Alabama over an issue that apparently is near and dear to the heart of Governor Bob Riley — the imminent danger posed by electronic bingo machines.

In recent months, thousands of these bingo machines have been seized in pre-dawn raids by the governor’s anti-gambling task force. Although the machines seem innocuous, the Alabama Task Force on Illegal Gambling considers them to be a type of slot machine, and slots are illegal in Alabama.

For more than a year, casino owners and Riley have fought in the courts and the Legislature about the legality of the machines that look and play much like slots, and pay out cash based on rapid, computerized games of bingo.

A Riley spokesman last week defended the actions of the governor’s task force, saying they are designed to keep officers and members of the public “safe.”

However, state legislators and others are divided on whether or not the machines are truly illegal. Most of them seem to be leaning toward allowing the machines, and are more concerned that the raids are disrupting business at the casinos. A number of casinos and bingo halls have closed their doors after the bingo machines were carted away.

U.S. Rep. Artur Davis, D-Birmingham, wouldn’t say whether he thinks the machines are legal, but he said that question should be answered through a statewide vote, rather than law enforcement actions.

“The governor’s current strategy of raiding bingo facilities is the wrong approach,” Davis said in an e-mail. “The raids have unquestionably thrown as many as a thousand Alabamians out of work.”

Even other Republicans are disagreeing with Riley’s obsession with eliminating bingo, including his own attorney general, Troy King.

Major casinos in the state are fighting back in court and in at least one case, have been able to get a restraining order on the task force from coming in and taking their machines.

VictoryLand, a large casino in Macon County, so far has been able to prevent the seizure of its 6,400 machines. A failed raid in Feburary brought hundreds of state troopers to its doors.

Yes, Riley is certainly saving Alabamians from the horrors of electronic gambling machines. But considering the money that the state must be putting into these raids, you’d think it would be better spent elsewhere — education, say, or roads, or how about public safety in general. You’d think the governor would have bigger problems to worry about than bingo.

Someone keeps moving President Barack Obama’s portrait in the Oklahoma House of Representatives.

“I think it’s offensive,” said Rep. Mike Shelton. “In my six years of being in the Legislature, it’s the most childish thing I’ve ever seen.”

Shelton thinks that a Republican member of the House is moving the portrait because he does not want to be seen in the same picture as the President during live streaming on the internet.

That would seem to narrow the choice down to who may be responsible, but Shelton is not giving clues on who that might be.

House Speaker Chris Benge seems to know who the guilty party is too, but he is not telling. Benge did promise an internal investigation with a public admonishment of the perpetuator.

The mysterious moving of the President’s portrait appears to have stopped for the time being, but not necessarily because Shelton drew attention to the deed. The portrait is now attached to the wall in a more secure manner.

• Rielle Hunter finally has given an interview. She still loves “Johnny.” She said that she did not know where the $5,000 a month the Edwards’ campaign gave her came from and that it was John Edwards’ aide, Andrew Young, who offered to be the father on the birth certificate. However, the real bonus is in the pictures she posed.
• Detroit is getting around to solving its problems. It has banned perfume from three city buildings.
• The UK is considering legislation that would make it “unlawful sex discrimination” for a gym to suggest that a woman cannot lift as heavy weights as a man.
• Wyoming Governor Dave Freudenthal signed a bill into law exempting Wyoming-made firearms from federal law as long as they are not taken out of state.
• Russia’s top public health official has called for a ban on alcohol sales after 9:00 PM.
• By votes of 412-0, 410-0, 416-0 and 423-0 the House voted to impeach Judge G. Thomas Porteous on four counts. Porteous is only the 15^th judge in history to be impeached.
• Kim Jong-Il has $4 billion stashed away in European banks in case the day comes that he is forced to flee North Korea.
• New Hampshire is weighing in on the important issue of the day. Should the state drink be cider or milk?
• Concerns of fraud are tainting the Iraqi elections as the results are withheld amidst reports that some precincts report more votes than there are voters.
• Rhode Island may be the corruption capitol of the United States.
• The Iowa Family Policy Center issued a statement declaring, “Homosexual activity is certainly more dangerous for the individuals who engage in it than is smoking.”

Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey has dropped his bid for the Minnesota governorship. That probably happened because Minnesota authorities told him to get out of the state after a restraining order was placed on him regarding his 16-year-old “fiancée” from Minnesota.

The 45-year-old Sharkey, who claims that he is a vampire, brags that he has not had a girlfriend older than 19 since 2006. Now he has a new girlfriend, 19-year-old Audrianna Foster.

Sharkey announced from Florida that he is seeking the Republican nomination for President in 2012. Sharkey stated that he opposes abortion and wants to improve veteran’s benefits.

Besides being vampire, Sharkey has numerous skeletons in his closet from run-ins with the law. He is currently on probation. His Wiki page identifies those problems.

Perhaps the most bizarre part of this story is the response from A.J. Matthews, Hillsborough County Republican Party State Committeeman.

“He does believe in Republican values,” said Matthews.

A vampire with Republican values? I have to assume Matthews is speaking of Sharkey’s abortion and veteran’s positions and not the blood sucking and impaling.

I can’t believe I missed this when it came out last month. Then again, I can’t believe someone would make a video like this promoting Israel. The video was made by the Canadian Council for Israel and Jewish Advocacy. It has a campaign titled “Size Doesn’t Matter.”

It is so bad that it is funny.

Ironically, the ad campaign and video promotes that size doesn’t matter, but did you see the map of Israel that the man was holding? The map is of a Greater Israel, including the Golan Heights, Gaza and West Bank. Of course, Jerusalem is the capitol.

It looks like size does matter after all.

No one will probably ever know what was going on in former New York Rep. Eric Massa’s head last week.

First, he announced that he was resigning because of the reemergence of cancer. Then, it emerged that he was being investigated for sexual harassment of some male staffers. It involved something regarding his overly enthusiastic tickling of a staffer. Massa then divulged that he was being forced out of office by the Democratic leadership because he voted against health care reform. The Democrats denied that. The Democrat Massa then became the darling of right-wing talk show hosts Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh for a short while. Finally, the House Ethics committee announced that they were dropping the investigation because Massa was no longer a Congressman.

Massa also announced that he wanted to leave public life and drift back to obscurity. That is probably the best thing since he has only left confusion and disillusionment in his wake.

The sexual harassment charge had some further validity when word came that his ex-Navy buddies complained of his tendency to grope them while in the service.

Massa even admitted that his behavior with male staffer was “inappropriate.”

All this sounds like Massa was trying to put up a smokescreen, but not a very good one at that.

It sounds like Massa needs to return to private life and take stock of his identity. For his week-long antics, Massa earns Foolocracy’s “Fool of the Week” title.

• By some parliamentary trickery, the House may pass the Senate’s version of the health care reform bill without voting on it.
• Both the Pentagon shooter and another shooting at the Las Vegas courthouse involved guns once in the possession of the Memphis Police Department. The guns were sold to private dealers so more appropriate weapons could be purchased by Memphis.
• In the “Why would anyone do that?” category, a television station in Georgia ran a story on a fake invasion of that country by Russian tanks and the death of the nation’s President. In 2008, Russian tanks really did invade, so not many were amused by the hoax.
• In May, an 18-kilometer hiking trail for nudists opens in Germany.
• The UK’s electronic spy center lost 35 computers holding potentially sensitive data.
• Germany is refusing to release files on Nazi Adolph Eichmann. Some believe this is because the files will show that postwar-German and Vatican leaders conspired to help Eichmann flee.
• The UK may lower the legal limit to drink and drive to levels equal to less than a pint of beer for a man and half-a-pint for a woman.
• An Argentine judge nullified South America’s first gay marriage on the grounds that “no elements existed” for the marriage.
• Georgia is considering banning abortions based on race, but how realistic is that really? It means a mother is either rejecting her own race or that of her lover’s. A purely race-based abortion sounds like an unusual circumstance.
• Tehran has claimed that the United States has begun a “cyber war” against Iran.
• Hugo Chavez wants to regulate the internet and limit criticisms against his government.

In North Carolina, Mecklenburg County Commissioner Bill James expressed his concern about the high-rate of herpes infections.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said that one in six Americans has herpes, and 48% of African-American women are infected.

James thinks he knows the answer.

“The problem is worse in the African-American community because there is more promiscuous behavior,” James wrote in an email.

James dismissed the suggestion that genetics may play a role in herpes infections as “a crock.” He then dismissed the suggestion that “biological factors…make women more susceptible” to herpes as “horsehocky.”

Don’t you just hate it when politicians use technical terms like that?

James also said the genetics claim is an insult to other races that “were not as promiscuous or immoral.”

That African-American women have a higher rate of herpes infection than men or other races could have a lot of possible reasons. Promiscuity could be one of those reasons, but to assume that from a report that breaks herpes infections into gender and racial categories says little about promiscuity.

Herpes infections can be from genetics, gender, promiscuity, education and the lack of preventive methods or a host of other possible causes.

When a prominent African-American in Mecklenburg County challenged James’ assertion, James eventually claimed that he was 1/64 African-American and that allowed him to address the issue as a “brother.”

Maybe he was joking, but I do not think so. If there is promiscuity going on, it is coming from the ideas that James’ keeps spewing. The man is embarassing.

In a slight return to reality, James tried to back up his charge by asserting that fewer African-Americans marry, and 75% of their children in his county are born out of wedlock.

Fewer marriages and more out of wedlock children are supposed to mean that African-Americans are promiscuous? In truth, all that means is that people who do not get married still have children.

Since these people are not married and have sex, that probably fits James’ definition of promiscuity.

Now if only he would give a definition of “horsehocky”.