Alabama Secessionist Driven to Activism because the Government Took Away His Topless Car Wash

Ever wonder what goes on in the mind of the people signing secessionist petitions? The man behind Alabama’s petition, Derrick Belcher, might provide an insight into that.

Belcher once ran a topless car wash in Mobile. Officials shut it down in 2001 and hit Belcher with obscenity charges.

“‘The government ripped my business away, and now they’re choking America to death with rules and regulations,” Belcher said.

Hold it. If Belcher’s semi-nude car wash was shut down, that was done by city officials. The feds aren’t going to send their agents there to prevent male Alabamans from the right to watch young women jiggle as they dry a car.

Yet this is the spearhead to Belcher’s decision to become a secessionist.

There are a lot of people who have signed the Alabama petition. It has over 25,000 signatures now. Other petitions from other states have similar enthusiastic numbers. Yet if these people are anything like Belcher, then they are confused. Belcher wants to secede from the federal government, which is far more likely to support his semi-nude business through the rights of free speech found in the First Amendment than the state of Alabama or city of Mobile, which are going to take a far less favorable view of his soft porn enterprise.

Do people like Belcher even understand the concept of government in America? Federal, state and local governments are separate entities. His problems aren’t going to be solved by secession, if he even grasps what that means.

While hundreds of thousands have signed these petitions, it is only a small fragment of each state’s population. In addition, the Alabama petition has thousands of people from out of state signing it. That raises the question of what these signers are intending. Are there thousands of people who are going through the list of petitions and repeating their signatures on other petitions because they are anti-Obama? Or are there people who find this endeavor humorous and thinking that the U.S. would be better off without states like Alabama in it?

It is probably a combination of all this. However, there is one thing clear, and that is people like Belcher sure have a crazy way of stringing their logic together.

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